messy games... again.

So... the girls came over and we had messy games... again. This was the third time this summer that we have had to endure messy games. And this time, they honestly crossed the line in the messiness they brought over. Usually, I looooooooove being covered in gross stuff. Wait. That was a lie. But, they brought Ranch dressing and relish. Can I even begin to explain the revulsion that coursed through my body? No, in fact. I cannot. But let it suffice to say that vomit kept attempting to come out of me. But I said, "No, vomit. Stay down." And it did. The ranch curdled in the intense sunlight. I mean, honestly. Disgusting. We tried to do this game where we styled staffers' hair with Cool Whip and then throw Cheetos and see how many can stick, but the Cool Whip melted almost immediately. I mean, seriously. We had an egg toss, and there were two girls from Mexico who speak very limited English, so I went over and tried to explain the rules to them. Apparently, my Spanish isn't quite good enough to explain simple rules for tossing eggs. Go figure. So, I called over one of my campers named Carlos who is from Mexico. He then attempted to explain the rules, but he ended up saying, "Tienen que throw this al pelo de los counselors." Essentially, his Spanglish was ineffective. So, we just left the girls to learn from experience. Welcome to America, I guess. Then, that night was Guerilla Warfare. We threw water balloons. The end. Thursday was my day off. I bought a Bible. It was expensive. It made me angry because, clearly, Jesus would not gouge people for money. Bible-selling jerks. The day was relatively uneventful, otherwise. I got my rooming assignment for Spain. I am living with an old widow without children, which is literally the exact opposite of what I requested. Awesome. Yay for geriatric housing in foreign nations! Adios.